This is a phrase I like to use when teaching Pilates classes. I often see participants unnecessarily tensing neck and shoulders when we’re working legs for example. It strikes me that this could be a good cue to think about regularly throughout your day.
Many people assume that if something hurts, the solution is to strengthen it or work it harder. But often, the opposite is true. Your body is asking for less tension rather than more effort.
Pain can develop when muscles constantly work when they don’t need to be. Over time this can create tightness, fatigue, and imbalance. Restoring balance by relaxing, lengthening or gentle mobilisation can be helpful.
We can carry unconscious tension throughout the day e.g. tightening your shoulders while working, clenching your jaw when stressed, or gripping your lower back without realising it.
This is why it can be helpful to start by becoming curious about your movement patterns, daily habits, and posture. A simple place to begin is with awareness.
Take a moment to slowly scan through your body. Notice if there are areas that feel tight or guarded.
When you find a place that feels tense, take your attention there and mentally invite it to “relax and let go.” Use your breath to encourage softness to the area as you breathe out.
This simple process can make a profound difference.
I often speak with women who are frustrated because they feel like they are doing all the “right things.” They exercise regularly, stretch, and even book massages, but their pain or tension keeps returning. This can happen when they only address the surface symptoms rather than understanding why the body is holding tension in the first place.
Kinesiology can help uncover some of these deeper patterns. Using gentle muscle testing, you can identify underlying stresses that may be contributing to pain or imbalance. Sometimes these stresses are physical, but they can also be connected to emotions or past experiences/trauma that your body holds onto.
When these underlying factors are acknowledged and released, the body can respond with a sense of relief and ease.
Movement practices such as Pilates can also be very helpful. Because Pilates focuses on mindful movement, body awareness, and alignment, it helps retrain the body to move more efficiently rather than simply pushing harder.
Instead of trying the make your body stronger, aim to encourage your body to move with less tension, and greater balance and ease.
I encourage you to ask yourself:
What in my body doesn’t need to be working right now?
And then gently allow it to soften.
